“Diligently. Work patiently and persistently. Patiently and persistently. And you’re bound to be successful. Bound to be successful” -S.N. Goenka
What is it that you want right NOW? In this absolute moment, is there something you can’t stand to be without? How are you feeling about those extra pounds you’ve been trying to lose? Still craving that dream vacation? Tired of being single? Looking to figure out why you’ve been put on this planet?
Good thing you can instantly find the answers to all that you seek (thank you, Google ;p). A multi-billion dollar industry is predicated on your desire to have things immediately–instant gratification. Fast food. Instagram. High-speed internet. Amazon One Click. Everything in an instant.
Lose 15 pounds in 15 days. Take your dream vacation with no money down (even if you can’t afford it). Make EVERY girl fall for you with these three words.There’s an inherent problem with these quick-type fixes. None of it works, long-term. Are you still super-focused upon becoming a better version of yourself?
Let me share a personal story.
I was in the mood for some fresh guacamole. So, I drove up the block to the neighborhood grocery. Within five minutes, not only did I have two ripe and ready-to-eat avocados, but also a bag of spinach, garlic cloves, eggs, dark chocolate, and a couple of Fuji apples to add to the mix. So much for staying on-task? Off to the check-out where I smoothed my way into a semi-empty line. Jackpot! A short wait and little chance to allow my temper-mental tendency toward impatience to surface …or so I thought. The cashier on this line had other plans. She methodically looked over each item that the couple in front of me was purchasing and carefully placed them into plastic bags. Cold with cold, dry with dry, and meats properly separated. I could feel my internal temperature rising. I’m used to quick and assertive cashiers. The types that ask you how you’re doing because they’re supposed to and quickly mosey on with the next customer. This cashier was different. I wondered if she could sense the forced smile that I attempted in my effort to mask my fidgety dissatisfaction. She just kept smiling. At this point, I began shuffling through my mind for ideas. I could jump to the next line or maybe head over to the express checkout. I didn’t want to wait. I wanted my guac NOW. Yet, my gut was telling me something other than, “Hey man, I’m hungry!”
“How you do anything is how you do everything” -T. Harv Eker
I wanted the quick fix. Yet, I knew from my twenty-five + years of experience, there’s no such thing.
I realized that this was an opportunity for me to practice a behavior that has escaped me for nearly my entire life. While I could’ve enjoyed the spicy guacamole a few minutes earlier by maneuvering my way to a shorter checkout, I decided to take an unfamiliar route. After a couple of deep breaths, the feelings of get-me-out-of-this-line soon passed. I was greeted with a warm and welcoming smile and I began to relax as she mindfully packed my items: cold with cold, dry with dry.
I share this story with you for one simple reason:
Patience is a fundamental part of living an extraordinary life. We all want the answers. ALL OF US. I’d be lying if there wasn’t a point where I even asked my coach for the secret formula. We’ve been conditioned to behave in a way that is based on immediate results. Instant gratification. Just because we’ve developed unhealthy patterns of impatience doesn’t mean we can’t work to improve this area of our lives. Just like your physical muscles, patience is no different. You have to work it out for it to grow. Eventually, the unwanted internal feelings will begin to not affect you as they once did.
Not only in my life that I’ve noticed this reoccurring theme of wanting the quick fix. At some point, this has also shown up for most of my rockstar clients. Even when we work through clarifying who they need to become in order to have the life they desire, they can still fall into the instant gratification trap. This is usually when we resort back to our WHY statements. Why do YOU do what YOU do? This isn’t about perfection. We are human. Each one of us will fall into the “magic pill” craze at different points in our lives. What’s important is how we react to the moment.
What will you do, when you feel yourself falling into the “give me the magic pill” trap?
Here are a few ways to regain your patience, young samurai:
Ask Yourself Why. Why are you doing what you’re doing? What’s the motivation? Intrinsic (from within) or Extrinsic (outside of ourselves? The science has proven that being only extrinsically motivated isn’t sustainable. While there is nothing is wrong with being extrinsically motivated, (fame, beauty, money) we must also be able to find part of our motivation intrinsically (within ourselves: contribution, growth, connect, serve).
Make It A Game. Goals are great, but if you’re not enjoying the process of reaching your desired outcome, you’re going to be absolutely miserable. We spend a majority of our time within processes, so why not enjoy them? Find ways to make it fun. Take video game breaks. Phone a friend. Be playful. Have a massage break, or get social within your local community. Make your rules! If you’re not having a blast on the way to achieving your commitments, revert back to your why. Make it a game. Make it FUN.
Celebrate the small wins. Don’t wait for the finish line to kick back your feet and have an AM dance party. Start celebrating now. Celebrate as if you’ve already hit every commitment that you’ve set out to achieve. That’s right, give yourself a hug. You’re worth it.
Commit to excellence and gratitude. Do everything in your power to set yourself up for success. That might mean making a call that scares your pants off. Do it. Carefully craft your next blog post, but don’t wait too long to ship it out to the public. While you commit to excellence, don’t forget to give thanks. Think about how far you’ve come. Remind yourself that if you’re reading these words right now, you’ve already won.
How’s your patience-o-meter feeling right about now?
Just remember, in your life, shit is going to hit the proverbial fan. How will you deal when the next magic pill comes along for you to taste? We all have a choice to make, what will the best version of yourself choose? I choose to painfully practice patience. 😉
Where do you find the most difficult part of your life to be patient? Is it in an area of your expertise? Within family? We’d love to hear in the comments below!
P.S. Next Tuesday, 3/25, we’ll be opening up applications for (2) scholarship opportunities, so regardless of your financial situation, you can get to the bottom of the lets-figure-out-how-I-can-have-the-life-I-desire with some personalized one on one coaching with me. Applications will only be offered to those who are signed up for the weekly ITMS exclusive. Be sure to add your name to the list!